day 2

me has no be sleep well. an about 12:15am me got to feel the crisp fall air an see the unstarry sky. me is tire of this. me has no clue why persons are so cruel in this world. there is no reason for anyone to have it set out that them is go destroy a person.
me new room is smaller, lot. no window still. me has met me new guards. there is six all to gether. them seem cool. two stand at door while one sit at nurse station. them switch up ever so often. there is to lady ones. one seem mean, but it just her seem, me no think her is. me could be wrong.


it is o most wed an it o read seem like it be week. again the tv was hook up to where me has to watch whole investigation. me is jus glad me is no there. one thing that stuck out today, an if me get in trouble for say this, ah well, was this:

          "her life is the on thing hold me here. wit out her, you would have no thing an me an me brother would be free. her life for the last 4 years has be no thing. her has be run, cuz her is wuss. her has be hid behind lie that ever thing will be fine when her kno it will no be. an her purpose, her has kno that too, an has love ever min of it."

it just went on an on. an him no ever admit to any thing, so them can no use no thing against him. :/ . feb 012 will be 5 years an if him is no charge by then them him will have less time. me o most feel it all jus go end up wit no thing happen. no sentence, no time, free to do it gain. an it that happen, an it happen gain, me no think me could live.
me no want go thro it all gain. #truth

eve one is say how it is def become fall out, cuz it get cold. me feel it too. it is cool in me room. me has 3 blanket. me sleep no soon after me got here an me think nurse, who is real nice, put extra blanket on me. me sleep real good wit it. me had lot weird dreams. me dreams are alway weird. like that one wit the indians also had me friends, an persons from glee. ya, me know, weird!

today me stomach has hurt lot, feel like some one yank on me stomach. me has be real shake all day. lite headed, an eve time me take deep breath me left side throbs wit a sharp pain. me is still no able breath well, but hey, who cares. lol

me has date on friday. an saturday afternoon. make me happy that me get to in way be at wedding!

me fin got to chat wit me pig for a bit. me was real happy bout that. her crack me up.
then me found this stat an me had to give in to bambam's thing bout me be awesome, an admit it, but it was on once, so, her is win!

me last few post have either be very down or toned in anger. me is no go say sorry, cuz it is how me is feel.

me think morrow me is go see if me can get some crayons or coloring book, me is go want try. maybe you color wit me? :)

me adventure just keep get more interest. the journey bit hard er eve day but, it is life, an no one say it would be any where near easy.

Thursday

me thot me was go sleep for bit an then say wit ash. me no sleep at all. so me watch news think it put me out fo sho. then come to find out it pull me in an me could no stop watch it. Topeka has done way wit law of domestic violence, so now it is ok to beat one nother up. :/ an in washington them is think bout do way wit p&p, so 100's of criminals be walk round have no one keep tabs on them. got to admit, me is lil freak out bout both these issues. an on top that multi vitamins no help but hurt u, so me is go start fuse to take me multi vitamin.

one the nurse that real like me took me to hallway window so me could see the clouds. them was PRETTY! me loves the clouds, storm clouds. big puffy an purple blue.

me did get say wit ash yester nite. just for bit tho. me want her to have time wit stephen. :)

me kind got pinch by some of what lot persons say all day. it no big deal cuz me kno it true, but it jus some me is um sensitive? bout. me spell! it is bad. an me is work on it. me is real try hard. an me say to ash when me say wit her, me no see words way them is see by eve one else. here is few words to help u get what me say (nurse did help me wit this)

me to me is i.    persons is group. people is one.    get mean um sense or um understand.   say mean talk, tell, told, said.    spell mean um write.  no is not.

this is how me brain see stuff. but u can help an um make right when me no say right. it will frustrate me cuz me brain no see that way but me has to learn. an me think some me friends or persons get frustrate wit it. an that make me even more frustrate. *nods* an if any thing me is pinch by me spell cuz me is have hard time wit it. but this me will get better at to.

day me head hurt lot. me feel some one hit me wit hammer. an me chest is hurt. me think me wisdom teeth are fin come in. me right side of me mouth is hurt lot. me teeth are real sharp too. me could cut me tongue in pieces. lol. me is no go to, me is jus say me could. lol. now me can no lift me head at all. nurse prop me up an put pillow hind me head an computer in me lap an hands on it.

few persons keep ask me if me can have visitors, it sad. me want visitors but them have keep me safe. them no kno just how um dangerous? me friends are to gether. hahaha. them will keep me safe. ;) . sad tho me can no see no them faces til the other guy is put behind bars. :/. but in way u can come visit. hahaha. me has find it but me do have skype. me just can no video call or voice call but u can. it no same cuz u can no see me or hear me, no that there is some to hear, an trust me u no want see me face, it no look like me. lol. or if u no time to skype or IM u can make video :). lol, jk. on if u want to. or u can send card or letter or some. kara send me pic of her an me :) wit her card. manda send me chuggers wit her card. it just idea for those who are like me an frustrate that me can no have visitors yet.

mama canady call me mazing young lady. me gree wit most it. haha. me is some what mazing. me is young, an me keep forget me is 22 an no 16, lol. no joke. me kno no why but me just find it weird when persons call me girl or babe or sweets, lady, or even woman. me is use to certain persons call me certain things. so when me here it from some one else, it is weird.
lindsey - girlie   bambam - honey  becks - sweetie  lynn - girl   jess - babe . haha.

me dad say me is very picky, an him is right. lol. but that is main wit food an foot ware.

me say wit jasi for bit. her had good nite an me was glad. her was happy an when her is happy me is happy.

me got a bad message from a friend over some stuff me family start. them was pretend to be me an sent me friend message thro one me emails. them hacked me. them jerks! them has do other stuff too. so now me friend is mad wit me an no say to me, an me guess me no blame them.  it just suck.

me has spend most me day sleep. me has had real weird dreams. them bit scare but it ok. me is real tire. me is wear oxygen mask now. it no longer the nose thing, but the mask. me feel like me can no breath at all. me is no feel well at all. motions get me down an sick kick back up. but me is go try to keep smile on me face.

this day is no over. me adventure is no over. me still has lot of beast to slay, new land to um conquer?, enemies to defeat, an allies to meet. me adventure has just begun, an there is still more to come!

think

me last post was very short an no full much.

last thing me want is be left lone. me is tire of be lone. me no want do nothing. me no want look out window me no want try walk, me no want read story, me no care to do any that. me no even care to get better.
me no like feel this way at all.

me on got 3 hour sleep. me try nap. eve time me close eyes me see no thing but bad. me is real tire tho.

this post call thinks cuz it full of thing me think bout.

walk. me is like that me can walk some. me has work real hard at walk. it just hard to get use to cane. me like me cane but it just hard walk wit. me no know bout run any time soon but me hope me get take walk in park. me would like take bubbles for walk, but me prob need friend to help. me would like just take walk wit friends.

outside. me do like be outside. me like walk barefoot. me like  have window open in me room an sleep like that. me like sit outside wit dogs an take in nice day. me like take blanket an lay on it in yard wit dogs or friends. me also love listen rain an thunder. me love snow fall.

moms. me love parents. me love meet other persons parents. me think parents are cool. me love to learn from them. me love to see how dads do thing, and learn from them. me mom has be gone for 4 years this month. 25 at 948pm. me member it, it was thursday. me miss me mom. last thing us did was fight an last thing her say me was out anger, me hate you, that what her say. me has no real eve have real mom. me mom was in drugs an alcohol an do stuff wit lots guys. her left when me was 6-7. us no see her for years. then her come round an us no like visit wit her. her would alway pic guy over us. me alway say me is no go be like no either me parents. no no. me love moms. me is very happy to meet momma canady.

work. me has job. it good. easy. an me make sort good money. me is hope by time me move me no need to have cane so much an me will be able speak lot more than not. me think me would like security job for now. me no care if me has work nite shift. ok me do some but it be nice to work nite shift few time week. me think. me know there airport an there is bowin factory. so me is go look into stuff.

strings. me is no like leave me granma. her no know no thing bout what be go on. her just think me is real busy or out town. me dad say that when me move he say to her that me is go off to college. me feel me is go move an then me is no eve go see her gain. an me no like that feel at all. me has decide that me is go spend me first year in wa that mean holidays too. it no go be easy but me will do. then the next year me will go be wit me fam. me animals. me no like leave bubbles here but me is get to be ok wit it. me think me dad an me both have web cam an us have phone so me can say hi eve once in while. me is go miss have stardust lay on me purr purr purr eve nite but him be ok. me car. me has no decide if me is go take me car up there or buy nother car that will make it up there. me think me is go leave lot me no so portant stuff here, til me has place for it.

god. me say to me friend me no know if god is me god. lot of me friends say me trust god, god will take care ever thing, pray to god an say him. me feel like it way for them to blow me off. them no get that me real no know god. me may have but me no do now. them think if them say them things then it make me feel better an it no do. me do pray all time but it no seem help. may be god no like me, may be him loss hope for me. me has read me facebook an twitter an other stuff an me use to believe in god but fact be me no do now. me is work on know god an me is no sure if me believe in him or no. if god be an easy pass an a way for friends say ok me help you now you all better than me is no sure bout god.

sleep. me no has sleep well. yester nite me had dream where me mom was go kill her an me was try stop her. me ran to hospital roof an was hear voicemail her left on me phone. her was say sorry there no thing you can do me love you. an as me jump to save her her jump to end her. it was very sad. me has had bad dream most me life it seem.

home. me is hope go get go home wed. me know me fam has be jerks, them alway are. me just wish them would be um supportive for once. me know this no happen but it be nice if it do, this is how big an dumb some me hopes are. me would like to get home an them be banner say welcome home an flowers an balloons and it be like nice lil party. but me on dream. so me think when me get home me is just go go see movie after me is home for hour or to.

me know me blog yester was short an me seem like jerk, so me spell this an me still sound like jerk bit but me no care. it me job title - jerk, an sound like a jerk is under job duties. so deal wit it. :P

surprise

the pain that me feel got lot worse. me temp went up an me feel like someone was tear me part from inside.

me spend nite watch sun go down. it was real pretty. me real real like it. me like watch leaves turn color. me like make them go crunch. them talk bout cold move in by november. which mean more pain for me but me can bare it. me loves first snow fall. me loves to watch snow fall.  it get nice an peace outside an quiet. Christmas music start too. me fav song is lil drummer boy.
me watch wizards of waverly place and dragonball z and cops. me also watch some more big bad bettleborgs.

yester was a real good day. me think me do real real good. me has be try keep me head think good stuff all time. me want get better. me future just keep look better. me keep get better. me is have hard time get use to cane tho. it no long stick like that monitor thing or thing that hold iv bag. me is work on balance stuff.

me do lot think bout future. me is very happy to move way from home. it just be weird cuz me is no use to no thing but this type life. me has sleep in street, parks, um bandon cars an build, bus stops, bathrooms in winter, even trash can dumpster cuz me want to get way from home or me got kick out me home. me home an life alway fill wit fight yell mean stuff an word. me family is so mess up. me dad is dopted from germany. me no know me blood fam outside me dad sibs mom an her sis. me love me dad's dopted family. me real love me granma.
me grow up in home where all time us move. windows nail shut. all doors either gone or lock all time. bathroom door was lock all time an so was kitchen door. us were no lowed in kitchen ever an us had ask to use bathroom. front an back door had pad locks both on inside an out. us had no way use phone an dad had broke tv to where us could no change channel or volume or turn on or off.
us would go to school an us wold look like us were live in the ally. us were alway make fun of. them call me werewolf in elementry an middle school. it name that stuck too.
but that is me past. me future is look good. me no think me is go get to be what me dream of be but there is no thing stop me from try an if me on end up be some close to me dream then that good nuff for me. me is happy for me future. me get see ocean an mountains an seals. haha. no that no all. me is go get job an work hard at it. me is also go help out lots. me love help out.
it just go be weird live in house where there no yell no fight. it just go be weird to be in place that is peace.
one day me hope go africa. me would love go there an help them build home and to plant crops.
me think me future is go be great!
there are few things me no like bout it. me no like leave me granma but me think some me other family need step up an be there for her. me no like leave bubbles behind. me ask me dad if him think bubbles be fine wit me gone an him say yes. this is her home. her loves me dad, her an elvis best friends. stardust will miss me cuz me is him mom but him an the dogs are best friends an him real like me brother alan, which us all think is weird cuz no animal ever that us has had has no like him. gumby be just fine her like it here. her like me dad lots. me no like no be here for holidays. in 2003 me granpa got real sick round christmas time an us were in foster care an could no go see him. us got out first week of jan an went go see him. that was me last time see him live. him die a week later. so me is no big into no spend holiday no around me family. me know no why, holidays or birthdays or any day real is a good day. it just go be hard to spend holiday wit out me family. but me has to get use to this. me is read for new things.
any way. me no mean bore you wit all that. it just what be on me mind.

me get surprise day an me get go OUTSIDE! me is so happy see what it be. me is play memory wit therapist an me is get lot better at this game. me get new match ever day. them no make me do no thing but memory game. o an them want me work on spell word gain. them think me surprise will make me speak. me no know tho. them think me in way is choose no to speak an them know it most me can no physical speak. them think to that me surprise will help me walk bit better an real help me get better. me just no know what it be.

me is get better at make to window or take steps. me is get there bit faster. me still has get use to cane. it real weird try walk wit it. me no has strong leg them both same. one me hard thing do is get up out chair. soon me no have much trouble walk it just be balance. but me is go get that too.

me has no plan for weekend. me think me just pretty much spend lone. all me friends busy. so me watch movies an shows lone. me ask them bring me book from me home. me has sign book. so me can work on learn that.

me got go outside. me got me surprise. BUBBLES an STARDUST. it was real real real good to see them. me start cry. me was REAL REAL happy. me saw bubbles come toward me an me shouted her name, her start run her o most knock me over. it was the first word me has said. them were very happy me say word. me see stardust too. him was real glad see me an bubbles act like me had be gone forever. her was very VERY happy see me. her was jump all over. stardust got in me lap an start purr purr purr purr an him was sleep. bubbles got in me chair on wheels too. her an stardust stay on me lap an take nap. me want take nap too so me lay me head on bubbles. us play fetch an stardust watch from me lap. then us went for walk. me no could walk far so me sat in chair on wheels and them sort push me. bubbles pull me most time. when it was time for them go bubbles came an sat on me lap an no move. them try to grab her harness an her growl. her no want leave me. no no. me had get up an put her in car. her cry a n me cry. but no be long an me get be wit her for few days.

me eat. after me eat them give me me hat. it no look bad on me. me like lots. just got wait til monday for bandages come off. then if them say ok me can wear it. it blue brown an black.

me has be talk to manda, her is now shortie on me IM. me has miss her. her help me know what church, minister, preaches, an spiritual needs is. her is very good at that. her is move to mo an me is go get see her in few week. me is go stay wit piglet an then me is go may be stay wit roscoe an shortie. lol. me hope her like that name. me like nick names. help me keep persons right in me head. me is happy to go to moberly. me is happy me friends are get marry. me is very happy for them.
them are very good persons. them is go be happy together forever.

me read bible story. me no know if me should ask me asks on here, them no alway get answer. but me is go to. me on read one story. here me asks. me read a basket boat -
    - why did new king no like josephs family?
    - why did new king no want family to have baby boys?
    - how did her get basket to stay float wit baby in it?
    - why did the princess want or need some one to take care of baby for her? if her want it be her own then her should take care of baby.


those are me asks. me has figure out what do for nite. may be me watch movie. me no sure what me do. me know you find out morrow what me do, lol.

me is read go out of here. me is tire of same thing eve day. just few more day me hope.

me hope you has good nite. me love

yes me can

yester nite was good. no good me head was kill me. it was good cuz me friends make it good. me was get frustrate wit persons who say them me friend but yet treat me like me is worthless crap. an it was real bug me. me feel like me was let lot get to me since me was real tire an drug up an no to say the pain too. bambam was like say to me. at first me just feel like me be hassel. me was upset wit way some me friends treat me an me just feel me was go say some wrong an come off wrong to bambam an make her mad. then me think, me has no ever make her mad or o least that what her say to me. so me say her some what in me heart. an us talk. me like when us talk. make me feel better an me know it real did yester nite.

me is use to be good friend an no have good or great friends. me is real glad god give me great friends. bambam say to me that may be god show me who me good friends are an who me bad friends are. me no friends wit just anyone on facebook. me is careful bout me friends on facebook. me even make it hard to find me. me no give me location on facebook either. good number persons no know where me live or what town me is in. it kind funny.

me has be watch big bad beetleborgs. me use watch as child but it see lot better. it still pretty good.

me had hard nite sleep. me wake up lot. me head hurt lot lot lot. it on cuz it real sensitive. me no can shower gain for 7 days. boo.

me had nuff in me bank count to get me a nice hat an a cane. them should be here soon. me still has get new phone an look at get new laptop. me also think me need beanie. me hair short, an it get cold out so me head get cold.

yester me was happy hear from Jerusha, Tiffany, Jasmine, Rachel, Nikki, Tina, Michael, Ashley an Stephen, an Kim. it made me glad. make me smile when Kim an me got say for bit. me is so happy to get meet her. an what real make me happy was bambam say me that her an me big sis becks friends on facebook! now me two big sis' friends an it awesome. me an bambam gree us need visit her.

so now me have two mazing thing look forward to in me future. move to washington an visiting me big sis. but one the most happy things will be to give real hug to bambam an her parents instead of a scribble picture hug.

me end up sleep good long time. me wake up an me head still hurt me lots an lots. it smell real real real yum in me room. nurse put what she say a candle warmer an candle in me room. it smell mazing!

me sis becks post video on me wall. it was lot to get in me brain so me no got lot. me just know it was sad.
me sis bambam spell on me wall that her watch sun rise. her say it very pretty. me is very glad her got to do that. she say me is much more mazing than sun rise but me no know them are pretty mazing, me think. lol

me no like to take joy in me. me know me has thing that make me awesome at times but me no like to brag bout or stuff. me think there so many in world who no know that them is mazing or love an them need it no me. me like say to persons how awesome an special them are.

me has pt in bit. me go eat first. me think them go start me try steps. me is very scare cuz me has no had stand an go down or up in step. me has learn an get tho. me think piglet live on top story an her prob has lot of step. me has to get up them all if me go stay wit her. :)

me has ask - how you end a pray? me no member an me no think no one say me how. what is church? what is minister?

me put ? by words cuz me no sure if me um say word right or if it right word to say or all that fun stuff.

me is yum so me go eat now then pt. when me say go me mean me be in bed but me go eat cuz me is yum. me would share wit you but it be no good by time it get there. lol.

me go pt. me did very good. me even spell one word on paper. guess what word was? no, you no right, are you? me spell LOVE. me took more steps today. them say them take me outside morrow!!! yes yes. them surprise me wit me can. it rived. it pretty blue. an it easy use. me like it. me did better in memory too. an me got one step up step an one down step. it was good pt. now me go try make to window later. me no think me will cuz me is tire but me is go try. yep.

me dad think it weird me have cane an him keep send me jokes bout it. me say him me go wack him wit me cane. me do no think him believe me. me no lie. me will wack him. no me prob no wack him. haha. it sound nice tho. but me no like be mean. me no like hurt persons. no no. me like be very nice. me show you.
one easter me family an me were at bartlett park for egg hunt. hunt had finish an me had do good. me was walk round an there was kid cry. me was on 7-8. me ask why him cry. him say him no get no thing. so me open me bag an me gave him all that was in it. him mom came over an watch whole time say to me you no have do that. me say me no real need any this. me uncle an cousin come over an ask what happen all me stuff. me say to them what me did an me uncle made me cousin give me some his stuff. me do stuff like that all time.

me is no go worry bout me computer for now. it ok. me no worry bout me car. since me no use it most time or hard any time me let me aunt worry bout it instead. me phone. me get pay check even tho me be in hospital so me should be able get phone if me phone now no work. it just suck. me pics an stuff on it. boo.

me go read bible story. me read story of the message. here me asks -
    if joseph good then why in jail?
    how did joseph care for other persons in jail?
    why would butler forget joseph when joseph help him?
    why would corn eat corn an cow eat cow? it me no get.
    how did king know that joseph was wise?
me read story of a surprise visit. here me asks -
    why had no food grow for 7 years?
    why did joseph no say to them that he was their brother?
    why were his brothers afraid of him?

me watch wizards waverly place. max got turn to girl an there was no way turn him back. him parents enter him into girl contest an him won. it was funny. me love this show. batman cartoon on an me love this. me use watch ever sunday at 5.

me has be feel pain in nother part of me body. it is no good. me no like it. me lip is feel bit better. me is read for it no hurt. it hard to eat. an me lip alway go dry. me head is still hurt much. it hurt as much as it did yester nite. but me is no a big baby bout it today.  me cut me finger open day. me no mean to. haha. it was hurt lot now me no even know it hurt.

me is get yum. me go eat.

me made to window!!!!! me get put blinds up an look out. it is pretty. me see trees an grass. them trees are pretty colors. sky is pretty colors. it pretty outside! yep. today be great awesome day! an me nite is go be peace an nice too!

pictures

yester nite me was down an sad for bit. it is hard be here an the on face you see is those of nurses, docs, therapists, an few times other patients an/or them visitors. me miss me friends, them have be real help an love an nice an before any this me was no good friend at all. me no member much but me do member that fact. an yester nite me keep ask me why them be good friend to me when me has been no real friend to them? this some me ask all time to me. me do know to me miss them.
me miss me family. the yell the fight the jokes an just be wit them. me miss me animals stardust bubbles gumby even elvis, him is no me but him think him is. me miss me no so comfy bed an me dresser me still have from when me 3. me miss lot stuff.

yester nite me got real mad an upset. me was scare. me no want be sick no more, me no want to no no talk, me want to walk normal. me want to feel better and be better person. me think cuz me was real tire that it add to them feel.

me stay up an watch roseanne and wizards of waverly place. make me go haha real hard. me love to go haha. me is kid even tho me adult. me love cartoons and kid movies. them shows make me feel better. happy. me was up to 230. me went sleep.

me had dream bout airplane an persons from me high school day were on plane. me be on plane once but no member. me was on plan sit next window. me was scare cuz me no like high. persons me knew were be mean an make me feel no want. plane took off an me was no scare. me look out window an it was nice. me no member lot of the dream but me woke up mad an sad.
before me fell sleep me was think bout go on plane  an visit bambam. me no think her like that, but me was think bout it. me dream mind me that me is let me past keep me from me future. no more tho. no more. me go kick me past right where mother nature split it. yep, me said it! deal wit it!

me woke up. me was tire sad mad. an then me had post on me wall an  it make me feel all better. me love get posts when me wake up, it make me day start good.

me went pt. me walk wit help of hold some, from me chair on wheels to the tape on floor where one the helps was at. me got first goal done. then me stand wit no help for a hole min on own. to goal done. me 3 goal is to hum or say word. me has 4 goal an that is to spell one word on paper right an in lines. me on have do 3 to get go outside!!!
them took me back to me room an me eat. yum. me can eat on own now. me no need no tube, yay. the tube hurt lot. me therapist walk in an sat an eat wit me. him say me slow down or you choke on you food. me was want food. me lift me head up wit me face full food an just stare at him then me smile an me think him was bit weird out by me. lol. it was funny!
me finish eat and me tummy went yum. it was happy. us play memory an me got 3 matches! 4 cuz bambam say that me love her and her love me and that make match, :) !

me read 3 story all bout isaac. me no get them. me is get frustrate an me think me just go stop read bible story. it real hard. an me friends no alway round to help me get story. maybe if me can watch story or have some one read to me an answer me asks in person that help.

me eat dinner. it was yum. than me try make to window gain. 2 STEP AWAY!! an the blinds were down. :( . nurse say when me get there me can open blinds so it surprise. me want know if world pretty outside. me want know if it sunny an colorful. me love colorful. me just no like olive green. no no.

me watch glee. it was good. end was kind rush but hole show good. me love kurt voice him is me fav character. in real life him me age, him is real gay, an him voice is just as pretty.

just bit go me got real sad in me heart, deep sad for me friend. so me go pray for her lot nite.

me alway pray for me friend at nite sort like me do on facebook day. it help me fall sleep. an when me learn what pray is me has be do it lot. me love me friends. them nice. me like talk wit them.

morrow docs go fix me scars to look like one on me hand an face or close to them. it is a surgery but short one. it start at 230.
an me have pic so if some one say me lie me just show them pic. me hate when me told me lie. me no like lie so me no lie or if me do me no mean to. me love truth.

me got card today from kara an her send pic of we in it. me start cry. it was real nice. her one me fav friends. her alway happy an go haha. me love her! me is still wait for bambam's card, me think her cards no like me. maybe her should send to me home as me has got everything that be mail to me home. me have 3 cards an one video and chuggers. it real nice an me love them.

me is real tire. me has cry lot today. tho it has be good day. me is no cold but hot today. an me head itch lot. whole lot.

me name this post pictures. me got picture today. me picture what it be like outside window. me picture what me future go be like. me picture walk to window and back. me picture stand for more than min. me picture see me friends. me picture visit bambam. me picture move. me has lot of pictures in me head and me is just wait to watch them um, develope? in from me eyes an come to life.

4 Weeks An Counting

me no spell good so you have deal wit it! :)


me be here 4 weeks. me know no what happen or why me here other than me brain got real sick. me got real sick too. me hope tho that me on be here one more week.


Yester day me got took real shower. me got unstink. me smell real bad before me shower. me was scare me head look all ugly an like crack up egg. but it no look bad. me look like peach with marks on it. doc talk them fix up scars so them no that noticable. this make me smile. me no want scare children or me when me pass mirror? or windows. lol. me do has some hair. it no long, but me like feel it, it all smooth an nice. me no suppose rub it but me think it feel weird, sort in bad way, when me head is touch an you no can real feel dents. me forgot what them talk them did but some new thing. at least it no metal. lol. think try get thro airport or courthouse, lol.


me have be work to look out window. me want to see what out there an me hope it pretty. me member bambam talk me once her want send flowers. me look round me room and flowers be pretty in here. me start off an me could on stand 30secs me still no able stand well or balance well. me use monitor iv thing hold on to and try walk. me got 2 step then 3 steps and now 8 STEPS!!! that LOT for me. me o most make to window. me can see top trees an then me had grab chair on wheels an sit. sigh, me make to window soon.

me phone mess up. it turn on an go service day screen and then restart gain. me no money get replace, so me hope phone company replace it or fix it. net10 sucks. yep. me on have phone 3 months.

me thought me were go lose job but me found out me get more hours. so me go work 15 hours week.

also me look at canes an cute hats. me found few me like. blue cane that folds, me no know if me like that it fold or not but it got cushion handle. an hat blue plad, an other white wit black strips. me no know how me go get them but me know if there will there way, or me think that what them talk.

me be learn bout god, bible, jesus, pray, christian, an all stuff. me like it. me friends are very mazing an help me learn. them have talk lot over an over but that how me get it. me have child bible and adult bible, me read story every day out child bible. me like them pics. me no get story bout babel tower. me read story an put asks down an give to friends an me learn lot bout story from them. me learn lot bout hell. me no want no one go hell. make me heart hurt an me eyes cry. so me do lot pray so may be no many go hell.

me went to get adult bible and me fell an cut me up lip open. it no fun. it big an hurt. me feel like fish. lol.

yester me got box from mail. it have card an stuff animal in it. me love both. me name dog chuggers. him small but him cute an soft. me have got two cards an that all. that fine, me no think me get anything. me read them every day. me also got video on facebook an me watch that few times day. them make me happy and feel better. :D

me watch storm chasers an now me watch qvc christmas show. lol. me love christmas. me decide me want lil drummer boy figure for present. me fav song, me no member why. me play drums, maybe that why. me go bed soon.

me feel better me temp is 99.4 an be that way for few day me think. me alway have pain. me head hurt lot. me no sleep good so me alway tire. them took me off most medicine to see how me react an so far me do good!

tomorrow me have pt. may be me say them take me outside some time?!

me need try sleep now, me cold, so me get warm. lol.