today has just not been my day. no joke.
it is easy to change you phone number, it is easy to block people on facebook an IM, what is not easy is blocking people from email. i could change my email, but seriously do not want to. no joke.
my family is no good. i love them wit all me heart, but i cannot wait to get away from them. granted i am, but this is only temporary. i have put up wit sooooooo much from them. the chaos, the fighting, the unlimited abuse, the drama, the drugs, the disrespect...an so much more. it is time to get away from them. no joke.
most my friends do not get to meet my family, cept for me granma, for good reason.
let me tell you some bout me family.
me mom - a druggie, alcoholic, slept round, chose men over her kids, then let those men treat us however, married a minister who beat the crap out her an us (me) kids. she kicked me out in the middle of winter an made me sleep in the dog house wit both me dogs. last words her say to me were i hate you. now she is dead.
me aunt - moms twin, the oldest, did the same things, drugs, alcohol, men, but she married a man who is occasional abusive. she was there when me mom was not, an sometimes we call her mom. she is a constant reminder of my mom.
me dad - him is quiet, drinks, runs his mouth, on occassion is physical abusive, but now it is a real rare thing, he has kicked me out so many times. he works alot.
dustin - my twin - he is 4 years younger than me - he is 18, high school drop out, druggie, drinks, is part of a "gang", think he is the next eminem. he does nothing to help anyone. he goes out gets high an then goes home an sleeps all day. he is disrespectful. he steals, lies, cheats, sleeps around, and is pure lazy. none the less him is me fav, an not only cuz him is me twin.if you do not believe us is twins, ask anyone who has see us in person or look at photos of us. no joke.
rachael - 20. always poor me an everyones fault but hers story. drugs, alcohol, boys - under age -, drama like none other. her an dustin both sell drugs. always try to drag us into her problems
alan - 16, gay/bi - cannot make up his mind, in multi relations, does stuff with older people - cough cough - has a bad past. smokes, drugs, drinks, steals. has no job. drama queen. anger problem, yells, shouts, gets abusive, an is very disrespectful.
i love them all. but i seriously cannot take them drama. i have a post that is not published called dear god. in it i say this - is it too much to ask for a peaceful, clean, drama free home, with no drugs, drunkedness, abuse, where everyone is respectful, helps out?!
the only one that makes it really hard to leave is me granma. you are not going to leave, or brittany is not going to leave, or you are the only person i got. i love me granma. her is very old, an sweet.
it urks my buttons that my dad did not let me get away with nothing like what my sibs are get away with. him says things an then changes them an calls me a lier when i confront him about it.
i am def spending thanksgiving wit me family. but am thinking about finding somewhere else to spend christmas.
an it will be a breath of fresh air when i get where i am going an not have to walk into a house where i am judged constantly, bullied, disrespected, an treated like a dog instead of a part of the family.
today i was put down by my family in emails, an ims, an facebook messages, it is a constant thing, but today was just over the edge. an they made me feel like crap. an i got really insecure about me an my friends. for a long while, i had thot that they had all given up on me. it is a daily thot. but that is how my mind is working.
i am a freaking 22 year old that is on the level of a 2 year old in a lot of ways, trying to get thro elementary school, so i can graduate into adult hood with the parts of me that are already there. it is not fair, to me or anyone else, esp my friends. i am sure that them do not want to be go thro this wit me, but me is thankful for the ones that are. my family sure has not be any support.
i am a frakes, a romer, a baf. i am not my family, i am me. that is all.
it is easy to change you phone number, it is easy to block people on facebook an IM, what is not easy is blocking people from email. i could change my email, but seriously do not want to. no joke.
my family is no good. i love them wit all me heart, but i cannot wait to get away from them. granted i am, but this is only temporary. i have put up wit sooooooo much from them. the chaos, the fighting, the unlimited abuse, the drama, the drugs, the disrespect...an so much more. it is time to get away from them. no joke.
most my friends do not get to meet my family, cept for me granma, for good reason.
let me tell you some bout me family.
me mom - a druggie, alcoholic, slept round, chose men over her kids, then let those men treat us however, married a minister who beat the crap out her an us (me) kids. she kicked me out in the middle of winter an made me sleep in the dog house wit both me dogs. last words her say to me were i hate you. now she is dead.
me aunt - moms twin, the oldest, did the same things, drugs, alcohol, men, but she married a man who is occasional abusive. she was there when me mom was not, an sometimes we call her mom. she is a constant reminder of my mom.
me dad - him is quiet, drinks, runs his mouth, on occassion is physical abusive, but now it is a real rare thing, he has kicked me out so many times. he works alot.
dustin - my twin - he is 4 years younger than me - he is 18, high school drop out, druggie, drinks, is part of a "gang", think he is the next eminem. he does nothing to help anyone. he goes out gets high an then goes home an sleeps all day. he is disrespectful. he steals, lies, cheats, sleeps around, and is pure lazy. none the less him is me fav, an not only cuz him is me twin.if you do not believe us is twins, ask anyone who has see us in person or look at photos of us. no joke.
rachael - 20. always poor me an everyones fault but hers story. drugs, alcohol, boys - under age -, drama like none other. her an dustin both sell drugs. always try to drag us into her problems
alan - 16, gay/bi - cannot make up his mind, in multi relations, does stuff with older people - cough cough - has a bad past. smokes, drugs, drinks, steals. has no job. drama queen. anger problem, yells, shouts, gets abusive, an is very disrespectful.
i love them all. but i seriously cannot take them drama. i have a post that is not published called dear god. in it i say this - is it too much to ask for a peaceful, clean, drama free home, with no drugs, drunkedness, abuse, where everyone is respectful, helps out?!
the only one that makes it really hard to leave is me granma. you are not going to leave, or brittany is not going to leave, or you are the only person i got. i love me granma. her is very old, an sweet.
it urks my buttons that my dad did not let me get away with nothing like what my sibs are get away with. him says things an then changes them an calls me a lier when i confront him about it.
i am def spending thanksgiving wit me family. but am thinking about finding somewhere else to spend christmas.
an it will be a breath of fresh air when i get where i am going an not have to walk into a house where i am judged constantly, bullied, disrespected, an treated like a dog instead of a part of the family.
today i was put down by my family in emails, an ims, an facebook messages, it is a constant thing, but today was just over the edge. an they made me feel like crap. an i got really insecure about me an my friends. for a long while, i had thot that they had all given up on me. it is a daily thot. but that is how my mind is working.
i am a freaking 22 year old that is on the level of a 2 year old in a lot of ways, trying to get thro elementary school, so i can graduate into adult hood with the parts of me that are already there. it is not fair, to me or anyone else, esp my friends. i am sure that them do not want to be go thro this wit me, but me is thankful for the ones that are. my family sure has not be any support.
i am a frakes, a romer, a baf. i am not my family, i am me. that is all.
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